Give Your Marriage a Makeover
Let’s be real ladies, we give ourselves makeovers on a regular basis: hair, clothes, nails, shoes and even skin and after we feel great.
We deep clean, toss piles of unwanted junk, renovate and redecorate our homes, making big changes and small touches to keep who we were around while ensuring there’s plenty to reflect who we are now and what our tastes are at this moment. But how often do we think of dusting off the cobwebs and deep cleaning our marriage?
This spring make that most important relationship a top priority; revisit the past, plan for the future, and give it an overhaul to reflect who you are, together, now. Apply the elements of makeover magic to your marriage and you just may see your special someone in a whole new way.
We’ve got three ideas for you to reconnect with your partner that will have you giggling like you did when you were dating.
The Little Things: Acknowledge and Appreciate Each Other
A few weeks ago my husband randomly started making my coffee before he left for work. He’s never been a coffee drinker and did not ask how to make it, and the first day it was awful. But it was made, by him, for me, without any requests, hints or nudging on my part. That far too strong cup of coffee was the best cup I’ve ever had. And it was his way of taking one little thing off my plate and reminding me that he cares.
This simple act of kindness started my days with a smile, reminded me to say I love you more, hug him before he leaves for work and ask how his day was before dishing about mine. It’s silly, but prepping my coffee has reminded me to appreciate him.
Think about something simple you can do that will bring a smile to the face of the one you love and make it a routine.
Remember Who You Were: Revisit the Past and Reenact it
Something as simple as a perusal through your pre-wedding pictures can spark inspiration for reconnection. Those photos of biking along the beach, enjoying an outdoor movie, catching a favorite band, or taking dancing lessons will remind you of how you were when all you had to worry about was one another.
Bring those people back, if only for a few hours. Hire a sitter and plan an activity you once enjoyed without worrying if the kids can keep up. Talk, laugh and enjoy your few hours without interruption and you may find the old you is still in there.
When you get home, show your kids the pictures from your past as well as those you took that day; they’ll love to see you together. And maybe this will even lay some building blocks for their future relationships.
A Grand Gesture: Escape Together
If you’re blessed with a sitter you trust or family nearby, and the funds to make it happen, get away without your kids and rekindle. A multi-day vacation or a one night stay-cation in a nearby hotel will allow you to forget about the dishes, dinners, piles of laundry, yard work and kids for a little while so you can focus on the two of you.
Have fun together doing what you love. Drink during the day, stay up too late, nap, eat great food, order room service, and indulge in this far too infrequent time alone.
If a longer trip is in the cards, make it extra special for your significant other. Pre-book something you know will be appreciated, even if it’s not what you love to do. A concierge or vacation planner can help you with ideas that suit the area. A few to get your creative juices flowing include:
- Buy concert tickets
- Arrange a round of golf
- Book spa treatments
- Dinner on the beach
- Ski lift tickets
- A guided a tour
As a suburban Bostonian, my husband and I make it a point to escape someplace close by a few times a year to catch up. We look forward to the night or two solo in the city we lived in before the kids came along, or along the nearby coastline.
It gives us real time to talk (without interruption), and focus on one another rather than the dynamics of everyday life. It reminds us that our relationship is more than that of a mom and dad, and allows us to build a few memories kid-free.
Best of all, by the time we return we are always well-rested, reconnected and looking forward to returning to our family after our weekend together.
When we return to reality, it’s easy to forget that our partner is in this with us. When our kids are young and demanding, as they grow into wild teens, and when they leave to start their own lives our relationship faces new challenges. To adapt, a couple needs to grow and change together so the core of their family stays fresh.
This spring, I’m committing to giving my marriage the spring cleaning it deserves and continually refreshing it throughout the year so we remember who we were, who we are and where we’re headed.
-A Mrs. in love with the man she married, and planning to stay that way, Jess
We want to hear from you; share your spring cleaning relationship tips! Find Amazing Matriarch on Social Media- Facebook: Amazing Matriarch; Instagram: amazingamtriarch or Twitter:@AMatriarch and fill us in on your adventures using #amazingmatriarch.